Sometimes I have trouble with my guts
In fact it really drives me nuts
the pain and wind just grows and grows
I need a dose of lactulose!

Bent doubled over in despair
my guts are filled with gas and air
my abdomen sometimes grows and grows
Please give me NOW some lactulose!

And now the wind has just abated
and I'm so glad I never waited
my confidence just grows and grows
all thanks to trusty lactulose!