From scared student to qualified midwife baby-catcher extaordinaire (hopefully)....
today...
Today, not loving postnatal so much.
My mentor was, as usual, running the ward, meaning she had no time for me let alone the 9 women we were caring for. It was extremely busy, one of those days that you feel so awful because you have only spent 5 minutes with each woman, and one of those days where nothing is done, nothing is in it's right place and nothing works!!!
My grandad was admitted to hospital today (the one where i work) for his op on saturday, which i know, even though he hides it, he is extremely nervous about. It was important for me to be there when he was admitted as i'm not going to be able to come and see him again before the op. luckily my mentor was nice enough to let me go and see him in my break, but i didn't get time to eat and so didnt eat anything all shift and haven't eaten since 11 this morning
. oh well, good for the diet i suppose.
I was supposed to be going through my paperwork with my mentor- the whole shift thing has been badly organised- giving me 2 weeks and only 4 shifts with my mentor to get every skill and my end of postnatal ward interview done. Needless to say none of it has been done so now i'm stressed and am going to have to go in and work on my study leave, otherwise will fail my portfolio and the semester.
And, also, K, the lady i told you about in my other blog post (loving postnatal- ironic?!) returned to the ward today- with an infected perineum- and i barely had time to say hello, take her obs and stab her with a needle, which i felt awful about; i knew her, i had a bond with her and desperately wanted to talk to her and see how she was gettin on, but i just DID NOT HAVE TIME. so frustrating!!!!!!!!!!
Have felt very unsupported by my mentor today- who just went off and left me with rooms full of women, some of them sections who need obs quite often and 2 high risk babies who needed regular obs- i understood that she was busy, but i needed her help too!!!
At the moment i feel a bit lost on postnatal, i like it when it goes well, but i hate chasing midwives to get things done. I feel like my confidence will never grow, I will never speak up for myself and will forever be saying 'yes, that's fine'. Still questioning whether i'm really cut out for this....
aghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! just one of those days. Now i need food and bed. and not to think about how i am going to do my portfolio this semester
My mentor was, as usual, running the ward, meaning she had no time for me let alone the 9 women we were caring for. It was extremely busy, one of those days that you feel so awful because you have only spent 5 minutes with each woman, and one of those days where nothing is done, nothing is in it's right place and nothing works!!!
My grandad was admitted to hospital today (the one where i work) for his op on saturday, which i know, even though he hides it, he is extremely nervous about. It was important for me to be there when he was admitted as i'm not going to be able to come and see him again before the op. luckily my mentor was nice enough to let me go and see him in my break, but i didn't get time to eat and so didnt eat anything all shift and haven't eaten since 11 this morning
. oh well, good for the diet i suppose. I was supposed to be going through my paperwork with my mentor- the whole shift thing has been badly organised- giving me 2 weeks and only 4 shifts with my mentor to get every skill and my end of postnatal ward interview done. Needless to say none of it has been done so now i'm stressed and am going to have to go in and work on my study leave, otherwise will fail my portfolio and the semester
. And, also, K, the lady i told you about in my other blog post (loving postnatal- ironic?!) returned to the ward today- with an infected perineum- and i barely had time to say hello, take her obs and stab her with a needle, which i felt awful about; i knew her, i had a bond with her and desperately wanted to talk to her and see how she was gettin on, but i just DID NOT HAVE TIME. so frustrating!!!!!!!!!!
Have felt very unsupported by my mentor today- who just went off and left me with rooms full of women, some of them sections who need obs quite often and 2 high risk babies who needed regular obs- i understood that she was busy, but i needed her help too!!!
At the moment i feel a bit lost on postnatal, i like it when it goes well, but i hate chasing midwives to get things done. I feel like my confidence will never grow, I will never speak up for myself and will forever be saying 'yes, that's fine'. Still questioning whether i'm really cut out for this....
aghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! just one of those days. Now i need food and bed. and not to think about how i am going to do my portfolio this semester
Total Comments 7
Comments
 |  Kel, I feel exactly the same. Today was a rough shift. (Kel and I were on PN together today!) Although, I did offer to get you food, and found a manky sandwich in the fridge for you when I'd run downstairs to discover the canteen was shut.... All I can say, and you know this one already... Tomorrow is another day! And every day is so different - your next shift will be a good one. Positive thinking - works everytime. Either that, or I'm just deluding myself.... ;-) |
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| |  thanks hun- loves you xxxxxx |
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| |  This is what I love about having a site like this, you can come on, debrief and in many more cases now, you have a peer who had the same kind of day and you can support oneanother. Its really good to see you guys hanging out here as well a working together. Ria is right tho my darling, the next shift will be different, something will happen in the next few that will make you burst with pride and you'll be feel tip top again  its a rollercoaster this midwifery lark.Hope your Grandads op went well, hugs to him. You'll get your portfolio done, dont worry, we all feel like that. Jxx |
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| |  During my last placement on post natal I felt the exact same way, and my experience was exactly the same too, I hated it, I have to go back there again for a week soon, and I am dreading it. I didn't have a mentor throughout the entire placement, mine went on holiday the day aftr I started on the ward, came back then went off sick for the remainder of my placement. I too had to go back in my own time to try and get stuff signed. Some of which still isn't. Like you I am really worried about not having everything signed so I can complete the semester and progress to second year. Good luck and hope it all gets better for you, and you get stuff signed off. xx |
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| |  Hugs to you too! I think you are me?! if you've ever read my blog it is similar as there are huge up and huge downs! You are doing a great job, and it will get better as you know, small comfort right now I know. I hope your Grandad's op went well and he is ok, let us know? hugs to you, super student midwife! xxx |
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| | thanks for your comments guys- today is indeed another day- and i'm feeling much better. haha smwife ur right- my blogs are so up and down- no personality disorder, just a student midwife!!!! xxx |
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| |  LOL, my blogs are like yours, up one minute and down in the doldrums the next! P/N can be lovely when it's manageable (I won't say quiet!!) but an absolute nightmare when it's busy....I've watched the poor midwives running about and in some cases not even taken a break or had chance to go for a wee  Hope your Grandad's op went OK. Take care xxxx |
| Updated 11-Jul-2008 at 16:12 by Butterfly |
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