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I'm to afraid to get my hopes up.

Posted 24-Sep-2008 at 20:36 by L011y

If you were to read this and call me a negative person, you wouldn't be wrong. After a string of endless let downs in my 21 years, I can't help but lower my expectations and expect the worst to happen. I applied to university last year but felt let down by the tutors on my access course as they just didn't seem interested to help and down played the application process. I worked so hard at preparing for my single interview that I messed it up and didn't get in. This year I've become a home care assistant and have done several other things to boost my personal statement of which I am proud. I just can't help feeling like I'm building myself up for an even bigger let down. Is anyone else in my position? I don't have any children as I want to concentrate on my career, and I feel like this lets me down as I don't have my own experience of birth, Does anyone feel this too?
I'm terrified that I won't get in and its all that I want. And I really begrudge wasting another year of my life waiting around with my fate in other people's hands. I know how much I want this and I want to show them soooo much! I'll be heart broken if I'm rejected again.

This has really been on my mind - sorry if I'm ranting like a plonker, I just wondered if somebody is in my boat......at the edge of the plank too?

X x Lolly x X

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$KarrierBag\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\'s Avatar$

Yes, I worry about the no children thing but I got accepted for this year. Unfortuately, I couldnt take up my place and now I worry that that will go against me!! There's always something we worry about! Not having children will not go against you at all. Keep that chin up, it will happen for you xxx

Posted 24-Sep-2008 at 20:58 by KarrierBag KarrierBag is offline

Updated 24-Sep-2008 at 21:01 by KarrierBag

$Ani\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\'s Avatar$

Don't worry about not having children - it's not an entry requirement to have them - the quote I read somewhere was 'brain surgeons don't have to have had brain surgery!'
Good luck this time round. There are loads of tips on this site, I am sure you are already doing most of them anyway (for example keeping up to date with current issues in midwifery). Don't give up, some people take a few attempts before they get offered a place. If you are able to apply to more than one place, do, as it increases your chances. There are girls on my course who applied to the same places, got interviews, and some got offers and some didn't, there does not seem to be a pattern to it, it just depends on the different uni's. Sorry if this isn't making much sense!
Fingers crossed for you, hang in there x

Posted 24-Sep-2008 at 21:10 by Ani Ani is offline

I was in a very similar situation to you a few years back. I have always suffered from low confidence and self-esteem due to rejection from both my birth parents twice! So i went to college thinking now is my time to do what i want and show them, however i was constantly knocked back by my tutor who basically told me my ps was rubbish and i would never get into midwifery. I stuck with it and got a interview which like you i totally mucked up. This year I applied to one uni (not the same one) and got offered interview. I went and battled the voices telling me i wasnt good enough, through support from other people i got through my interview and for the first time felt confident. I was right! I got offered a place and I start on monday. So please dont give up, get your hopes up, its your dream and the only person stopping you do it is those voices telling you your not good enough! Tell them to sod off and start listening to your heart. haha can you tell you struck a cord with me lol. Good luck hun any help needed just pm me xxx

Posted 25-Sep-2008 at 08:10 by Billynomates Billynomates is offline

$L011y\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\'s Avatar$

Thanks guys!

Thanks everyone, this makes me feel so much better! I'll try and stay positive. Its nice to know that I'm not the only one that has felt this way. I'm just gonna have to go into those interviews (if I get them!) and blow their socks off!

I have applied to all 5 places to give myself a better chance, so hopefully you'll all be hearing my joyous rantings soon!
Now, I must get back to stalking the postman! hehe Cheers everyone! x x x Lolly x x x

Posted 25-Sep-2008 at 09:33 by L011y L011y is offline

	I feel exactly the same. I've sent my application off today, and although i REALLY want to become a midwife, i'm hesisitant as to my age and inexperience of reproducing is going to hold me back. fingers crossed for you!
	Posted 25-Sep-2008 at 15:21 by Emma1988x

$0lleh\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\'s Avatar$

Snap dude seriously don't worry, for everybody who gets in who has a kid there will be somebody hasn't! Just emphasize you are career driven, have no commitments holding you back etc. i mean in a sense this is better as i don't think juggling a family is actually an aid to getting a place, opposite probs..you just have to show you are emphathetic and understanding etc.!

Good luck, i am in same boat as you are so i am trying to practice what i preach while hounding track and feeling optimistic but insecure! CHIN UP GIRL...WE CAN TOTALLY DO THIS! Pm me if you ever wanna chat and be obessive with me, i am on MSN a fair bit too xxx

Posted 29-Sep-2008 at 18:23 by 0lleh 0lleh is offline

	$L011y\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\'s Avatar$ Wow, you talk such sense! Your totally right! I'm just gonna have to try be more positive! I know I want it more than anything...just want to be secure as a midwife before I have children. I worry too much Cheers! x x
	Posted 29-Sep-2008 at 21:33 by L011y

$june\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\'s Avatar$

Hi Lolly
Its the person that counts not whether they have had children or not. For example I know someone who applied to the uni I'm at a few years ago, before I did, and was gutted that she didnt even get an interview cos from her point of view she had sooo much experience - 4 children including a stillbirth, twins, Gestational Diabetes and a caesarean. The minor detail that she constantly and inappropriately talked about it the whole time eg when I was 35wks preg she gave me a blow by blow account of her stillbirth that had occured at 35wks - sensitive NOT!!!
Anyway I'm waffling but what I mean is that she would have made a terrible midwife (IMO) and it was right that she didnt get an interview.
But you did get an interview last year - doesnt matter that it was only from one place - it counts!!!! And now that you've done that you know what to improve on for this year.........!!!!

Go for it girl - having children or not is no obstacle. Good luck and keep us posted.

Posted 30-Sep-2008 at 19:40 by june june is offline

$goddessmomma\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\'s Avatar$

Hun I just have to echo what others have said. Having children does not make you a good midwife. When push comes to shove, and I mean that literally, you need someone there who is supportive and encouraging and behind you and that doesn't always follow that they have had children. It is your desire and love for the profession and your passion to give the best care and support you can that will make you the perfect person to be at any birth. It is so difficult when we want something so badly that it hurts. I've had four children but I may not be the sort of person they are looking for. I worry that I won't get in and God knows how I will cope if I don't??? I see this as my last chance saloon. I'm 42 next and will be 46 when I qualify if I get in this time round. God I'll be near retirement age!!! Don't worry hun they will be able to see your passion and drive and I have absolutely no doubt that you will get in. Sending you lots of love and big hugs and big congrats on passng your theory. xxxxxxxxxxxxx

Posted 06-Oct-2008 at 23:13 by goddessmomma goddessmomma is offline

	$newbiemidwife\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\'s Avatar$ good luck in your application at the end of the day you can only do your best and see what happens.we all feel the same and its the waiting game.
	Posted 22-Oct-2008 at 10:41 by newbiemidwife

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