Welcome to the Managing Emotions Area:: Please read

This forum was set up in memory of Theresa Naish, a Newly Qualified Midwife who tragically took her own life after wrongly believing that she was responsible for a baby death.

Her heart-breaking story is a painful reminder that in this line of work, sometimes, we all need to reach out to someone. To comfort, to offer kindness if it is needed, but most importantly to gain the support that we all deserve during difficult times at university, at home, and particularly in practice.

We are, or will be at some point, front-line staff. Dealing with people from all backgrounds, families, cultures and situations. We see people at their worst, at their best, at their most vulnerable and at their most terrified. We give ourselves emotionally to those in our care so that they may draw strength from us at a time when they need it most.

And not every case has a happy ending.

It is vital that we remember that we are human too. That despite our professional persona, we cannot shut ourselves off emotionally. It's important to remember that for all the love and support we give to women; sometimes we need some back.

So who can I talk to?

As a student you are still learning the basics of midwifery care, and at times this can render someone very vulnerable.

If you are struggling with something; an issue at university or at home be sure to share- with your cohort, your personal tutor, or a trusted lecturer.

If it is something case specific, something that has happened in practice that you are finding difficult to come to terms with or feel as if you need a bit more information it is best to try and speak to someone who was involved- either your mentor, or a senior midwife who may even be able to go through the written records with you if you have questions.

Don't forget about your supervisor of midwives. Certainly every midwife, but now every student, should have an allocated supervisor and a way to contact her/him. If not, there is always one on call who can be phoned at any point during the day or night- the details and contact numbers will be kept on the wards. There is also usually one working a clinical shift at any one time on the wards too. They will help you look at any problems from a more personal point of view- what you did, what (if anything) you could have done differently etc. They are usually experienced midwives and can impart both wisdom and perspective on the situation.

As both a student and a qualified midwife, your colleagues have an important role to play in how you make sense of your environment, your practice and the care that you provide. The individual nature of people means that, naturally, you will not get on with everyone, but for those that you feel you can trust, talk to them.

And finally, don't forget SMNET! Despite our members being at different points in their career, there will always be kind words of wisdom offered, from 'I've got that T-shirt!' to 'I can't even imagine that, but here's a hug anyway'. As long as you keep within the confidentiality rules to ensure all personal, patient and colleague details are kept anonymous, this area offers an important tool for you to offload your worries, and receive love, support and advice in return.

If you would rather not post something publically yourself PM Josie, me or any of the senior management team and we can create a thread telling your story anonymously, where you will still be able to see any responses. Alternatively you can also PM any of the staff here on SMNET for some support if you don't wish to go for a community response.

If you are having problems resulting from personal issues, university troubles, placement woes, emergency scenario nightmares or just a difficult day and it's all too much, talk to someone. There is no strength in silence.