Your reasons for leaving or thinking of leaving your midwifery degree

Im a 3rd year student midwife and for the last 4 months have been contemplating leaving my course. In first and second year all my grades have been either A's or B1's but i am struggling with balancing uni work, homelife and my part time job - Im not in a position where i can leave my pt job as it pays for my sons childcare whilst im in uni or on placement - I feel that im missing out on so much with him just now. I know I only have 8 months to go but when you feel this way - 8 months is a long time .

Coupled with the above I am struggling for normal deliveries as I have been passed about pillar to post with mentors/midwifes as I have had a lot of mentors take holidays or off sick. I kept being told dont worry about it as there is plenty of time to make this up. I feel that I havent had the consistency needed to build up my confidence in dealing with women in labour in particular and feel that I shouldnt be in 3rd year feeling this way.

I have arranged an apt to speak to my tutor about this but I am definately ready to walk away. I feel as if everything is impacting on everything else. I think the reason I havent done this up until now is that I am most scared of regretting this decision later on when my son is older. If I walk away now im not sure what qualification I will have - someone mentioned to me that I would have a diploma in Midwifery rather than a bsc in Midwifery, or I can use the credit obtained so far to put towards something else. Does anyone know if I am able to return later if my home circumstances change to make it easier for me to complete the course when I can concentrate on this fully. Will this be funded by SAAS? Thanks in advance

Well it's not really about leaving the course. I'm thinking about transferring to a uni closer to home which is 3 hours away from my uni. My family and I have recently been throw a family bereavement, and ever since I've been back at uni, I am finding it really difficult being here! I'm struggling to focus and I constantly crying! It's affecting me in a bad away being away from home, to the point I can't concentrate on my work or placement! Also I have a passing feeling of whether I am cut out for this job. I'm currently on DU at the moment and I'm totally overwhelmed! I feel like I know nothing! I'm nearly a second year, and I feel like I shouldn't be, do I have thought about leaving! However, I feel like I have worked to hard to give up now! I'll be meeting up with my PT at some point to talk with her about things. Hopefully I will get somewhere!

My story is nothing compared to some of the stories I've read about bullying etc. You guys that have gone though that are very brave.

I was a student midwife from 2004-2006 straight from sixth form. The reason I left is because my dad was very ill and my parents were living in Germany and I was in the UK. I knew my mum needed my help and support so I made the difficult decision to drop out. Initially it was meant to be only for a year. We moved back to the UK but after that year I felt that I still couldn't go back as my mum still needed me (or I still felt like I was needed). I didn't tell the university why I left - I think I was ashamed that I wasn't coping. I failed two of my last assignments which added to my embarrassment (I'd never failed anything before EVER!). I absolutely adore midwifery - there is honestly nothing better. I've thought about it everyday since I left and often feel very emotional because I couldn't finish. Gosh, I'm even crying now!

Anyway, now everything is ship shape I want to apply to a different university closer to home to start over. My parents and family are 110% behind me and will help me no matter what as they know how much this means to me. Also, I know I'm meant to be a midwife - I was born to be one and haven't ever wanted to be anything else. I am a bit concerned because when I was on placement I never had one mentor, not even on the community so I can't contact them for a reference. I was just passed about which I didn't think twice about at the time. Also, I don't think they'll remember me to be honest - I was part of a fairly big cohort. I'm scared that that will hold me back I guess. Sigh. Just had to get that off my chest really.

Hi everyone, I have read the above posts with interest and a heavy heart. I always wanted to be a midwife, and, like others, waited until the time was right for me (I thought). I had a successful career as a Sales Manager and gave it up so that I could follow my dream. I was a single mother of five who juggled and did my best.

I did not get my choice of hospital and was told that, as I could drive, it didnt matter that I would be practicing at a hospital over ten miles away. No-one even looked into whethe there was sufficient parking as I was to be doing long shifts. it ended up costing me a fortune in a public car park.
Anyway, the midwives in Community, although unhappy were absolutely wonderful and supportive. Labour ward had a culture of its very own. Midwives would huddle together, openly tell you that they didnt want a student as you would get in their way. They would sit in the staff room and have conversations in their own language across the room and ignore the students completely. I found that as soon as I put on the student uniform, I was a nobody. (My experience)
I also had midwives asking me why I wanted to give up a successful and well paid career to be a midwife. Many told me I was mad which was demoralising. I was also questioned as to why I wanted to do it at my age....I complained on behalf of myself and others to the Uni, but interestingly, the others all backed out of a meeting and I was left to face a panel of four senior midwives alone. I was labelled as "trouble" Anyway, I begged to be moved to another hospital as I was set to leave at the end of my first year. The Uni moved me and for a while things were ok. I then found out that my best friend had cancer and I fell apart emotionally. i tried to explain to the Uni. My personal tutor was understanding and told me to take a couple of months out of the course. This I did, and returned again after several months. Again, midwives were demoralised, my friend died and everyone just told me to get on with it. I found the rest of my cohort didnt want to hear that I was unhappy as many had issues of their own they were battling with. I dodnt know why, but I couldnt handle it. My friend had died, my sister was getting divorced and I was struggling with everything, even though academicallyi had held it together. I entered into my third year, demoralised, depressed (which I didnt know) and sick. Physicaly sick, as I developed ME and walked with a stick for a year. My doctor told me to quit. I was in bed, and the university called me and asked why I wasnt in lectures. I burst into tears. The cohort leader very calmly said to me that if I couldnt handle it, it would be better for me to quit, and to send her an email. I sent an email from my bed saying that due to circumstances I was leaving the course. No meeting, discussion.... nothing, just an email and the dream was over. I have since been told that it shouldnt have happened this way. I was depressed, and they should have supported me. That was in 2010. Several times I have called the Uni and emailed to say that I was better and could I complele my training. No reply, nothing. I am devastated and shocked. My confidence hit the floor because I tried to stand up for myself. I would like to think I can complete my training. I have since moved to another area, am working as a maternity assistant and have had encouragement to complete my training. I also, dont know what the future holds, but I know I have to try again. Thanks for reading this, and dont be put off, if midwifery is where your heart lies then so be it x

I'm so sorry to hear this runawayred, it sounds like you've had a horrendous time and an awful experience of midwifery, it's so uplifting to hear that after all you've been through, you still want to complete your training, you obviously have true determination and a commitment to midwifery. I am shocked at the way you were treated by your University, especially with the nature of the course; caring, compassionate, empathetic.. It's a disgrace. I really hope you get back into midwifery, at a University that supports you fully and understands the traumatic time you've had. Best of luck, I hope things go better the second time around.

JX

Im so sorry to hear your experience runawayred, I really hope you go back to finish your training. Hugs x

Many thanks for the support guys. I really am a woman on a mission now, and will try again. Like many of the others who have had a disappointing experience and have gone for it again, I too hope that one day I can truly be the midwife I want to be xx hugs to everyone