oops i meant to say it has not come from midwives!!!!

The first thing that struck me with the inital post is I would NEVER grab hold of a woman's breast and 'shove a baby onto it' NEVER EVER.

I would ask if I could demonstrate a method she might find easier to use, and also ask if I could show her using her baby as a 'model' if you like lol.

I would sit and talk to her, ask her what worries, concerns she has, suggest she holds baby in skin to skin and forgets about feeding for a little while. Just has some quality time with her baby in a relaxed way before trying again.

If she wants to do that, get them both settled and leave them for a while, telling her to buzz if she needs anything at all.

After a while, if she hasn't buzzed, go back and check how she is doing, then talk to her about feeding, and what SHE wants to do, it is HER decision after all, not mine, she has to take the baby home, and she has to be responsible for feeding and nurturing it, so she needs to be happy and settled with whatever method she chooses.

Sorry for the rant, but I am passionate about breastfeeding, but equally passionate about heping women make informed choices.

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Bless you Mum & Dad x
Student Midwife 2007

Student uni rep
Educational Resources Manager

Have you just been offered a place? If so and you want a mentor please post in post this forum (also post here if you would like a mentee)

Ahhh...a topic very close to my heart!

I breastfed my daughter 3 years ago, I did not have a long stay on P/N ward as I had a six hour discharge. But once at home my community midwife visited me and spent long hours helping me with positioning as my nipples were cracked and bleeding and I was in agony every time she latched on. She never touched me once, she helped with moving baby to the right position and helped me get settled in the best position too.

When I am working on P/N ward, the commonest way is to take the breast and shove the nipple to the roof of the mouth.(most of the midwives do this) The nursery nurse (whilst being very competent at getting the most difficult babies to latch on) uses this method. Many times I have answered the buzzer and tried every which way to help, without touching!

I am quite passionately averse to manhandling women's breast in an attempt to help with breastfeeding and hope to learn much more about support without touching.

On community, I accompanied my mentor to parentcraft classes and was asked to talk about my experiences of breastfeeding, I had to think back to my first born and the terrible time I had trying to get him to latch on, and how I got manhandled so much with so many different midwives. I discussed this point and many of the women were shocked, but at least prepared. I did talk about the benefits and the positive aspects also and focussed on my experience with my daughter and how it worked out so well in the end.

I guess my point is having seen both sides it is not easy, as a student we have more time to provide postnatal care on the ward, but not so much knowledge and experience. But i try my best to help, and I have managed to succeed without touching! Often so far I have found simply giving the women time and helping them to relax works wonders.

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hi all,
I have bottle fed one child and breast fed the other two. The first time I bottle fed I was not informed about breast feeding( as not promoted so much then) so decided to bottlefeed. However a couple of days in I had a huge urge to breastfeed when my milk came in. I was young and naive and didn't know what to do and felt I had let my child down and distressed. My next child I knew I wanted to breast feed but again was not informed about the down side of cracked nipples etc and again became distressed. By the time I had my third child I knew fully what to expect and decided to breast feed but if it didn't work out, not too stress. Third time was very enjoyable but I believe feeding my other too children could of been enjoyable if I was informed fully, not told parrot fashioned but really discuss the whole topic fully whilst feeling relaxed.

I think the moral !!! of the story is mothers need to be fully informed of all different aspects of our natural instincts and how hard it can be, and then if we are not comfortable the decission to bottle feed not to be made out as a poor choice. Ibelieve this is very important as the slightest bit off distress can cause a woman to fall into a depression and this needs to be avoided and i can see only by fully informing these woman, which all of you sound great at!

Just hope i get accepted so I can put this into practise!!

Carla
(fingers still crossed !!!!)

Hi everyone,
Just saw this thread and felt that I would like to add my experiences. I agree with midwifemissy not to touch when assisting with breastfeeding but on the other hand watching them struggle while you are trying to verbally help can be frustrating for both the mother and midwife. More often than not i guide the baby on to the breast when they have a nice wide open mouth and i have no need to touch the breast at all - the mother usually attends to that herself. I do have a community midwife mentor who makes no bones about grabbing the womans breast and shoving the baby on forcing the baby's head to stay in position.
When I had my children, 20 years ago - I was a young mum- i received no instruction or help with breastfeeding. I breastfed my daughter for 5 weeks and my son for 3 weeks and my youngest was bottle fed. I feel cheated that I was not given any information like the benefits of breastfeeding, just told it was good for baby, or encouraged that I was doing it right. If i knew what I know now i would have breast fed for longer and not touched formula at all because in hind sight I didn't need to but i was young and naive and I just did what I was told - sad isn't it.
I am not adverse to bottle feeding, that is not the problem really, the issue is giving breast milk or artificial milk - the baby still benefits from breast milk whatever way it is given but breastfeeding needs to be brought to the forefront and we as future midwives have the power to make a difference but we all need to be proactive and not fall into the trap of not having enough time to spend with our women. Sorry that i have had a bit of a rant but feeding our babies ourselves is a unique thing that only we can do and at one point in time it was in danger of becoming extinct. We need to be able to fully inform mothers and support them with whatever help they need be it practical or emotional.

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Year 1 Student Midwife and lovin it

At 21 in 1990, I didn't have a clue, My mother 'couldn't do it' and my brothers and I were fed 'Carnation'. She was no help and had bought bottles, sterilisers, milk etc for me (her) despite my plans for extended breastfeeding on demand ("these silly new idea, Carnation was good enough for you...rod for your own back...I put all of you on your tummy's..Didn't do you any harm" Mum's, bless um.). Midwives told me I was doing it wrong and made me feel like I was bothering them. I lasted 14 days. I gave up deflated, feeling like a failure to myself and my child.

I went through the same process twice. Each time feeling more of a failure. My boobs were huge. There was obviously plenty of milk. What was wrong with me? Why couldn't I do it? 4th time lucky (2001), my community midwife on her last visit asked how the feeding was going. Long story short, within minutes she had me feeding, pain free, regardless of my cracks and blisters. I didn't have any problems feeding my 5th.

I'm passionate about breastfeeding but I do understand its not for everyone and feel its more important for mum and baby to go home feeding happily than how.

Mine, and the ones above, are similar storys to lots of mothers I have met at the many breastfeeding groups I have been to. Not having the support or skills to be able to breastfeed when you have your heart set on it, can leave you feeling deflated and a failure. Many expected, as I did, the midwives to be supportive and knowledgeable. Who else do you turn to in those first few days?

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overexcited http://www.studentmidwife.net/../../...t5_b/party.gif Can u tell?

Lovepants, your post makes me sad, because it is far too common an occurance. It is really important that you debrief your experiences with someone before you start your midwifery training. There is a lot of research out there that supports the view that breastfeeding is best for babies, it is indeed the normal way that a baby should be nurtured. As you so rightly point out bf isn't always easy, however, that does not take away the risks that should be attibuted to formula feeding.

We all bring 'baggage' into midwifery and debriefing our experiences - good or bad - is one way of bringing fresh eyes to the women we meet.

I always take the time to let mums know that breastfeeding is best for baby and best for them - pointing out the benefits - but also stress that in the first couple of weeks or so, it can be very hard. I explain that although natural, it is a process that has to be learned by both mum and baby and that they don't always learn at the same rate!

I use the analogy of a toddler - it is natural for a baby to learn to walk, but it doesn't just sit one day and then walk a mile the next - it takes small steps and falls down often, but it is determined and eventually, after a few weeks, the child has learnt to walk unaided and then there is no stopping them. Breastfeeding is similar. If mums know this, they find it easier to get through the first couple of weeks and then when it is all settled down, they can enjoy that magical experience for many months or years to come.

KS

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Kentish Spitfire
Moderator, Student Services
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"It's better to be thought a fool - rather than proved a fool!"

That's a brilliant example Kentish Spitfire, I will remember that for when I am helping a woman and baby learn how to breastfeed. Thanks for sharing that.

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Bless you Mum & Dad x
Student Midwife 2007

Student uni rep
Educational Resources Manager

Have you just been offered a place? If so and you want a mentor please post in post this forum (also post here if you would like a mentee)

Hi guys this thread seems to be quite a help i am quite glad i started it now and i hope all the midwifes to be who have commented all the luck because i think you will all make brill midwifes with the advice and comments that have been made