Hellooooooooo everyone,

Have just introduced myself and am now starting my own thread....whatever next? (Probably because I am pondering something and wondered what other people would do )

So, today I am talking to a pregnant mum from school (at a party) don't really know her that well, just speak when taking kids to school. I ask her about her imminent birth and she says last time she had no pain relief as she likes to feel in control and not feel sick etc, but this time says she might opt for diamorphine. In my limited experience, it is awful stuff and makes the mum so out of it and usually sick and then have a sleepy babe who won't bf. I just can't see anything right with the stuff. So I tell her this.

Now my question is should I have done this ( i.e. be so negative and actually offer an opinion)? I was speaking as a friend and not a student midwife iykwim but am now wondering 'am I always a student midwife'. Plus I am also thinking that I can well imagine me saying something similar even when qualified and I think this is probably wrong as really I am giving my opinion. Gosh it's hard this midwifery lark....so much responsibility!

So please tell me what I should have said?

thanks for listening

xx

Hiya, to friends I am always honest - in a non commital - highlighting it's very much just my opinion etc etc - but will say outright if I think something is a good or bad idea - if that makes sense.

With my 'ladies' I am a lot more softly softly (having said that - I'm not very 'soft' at the the best of times - but for me I'm softly softly!) - give them the facts as best I know them and try and find pros and cons for both sides -hopefully helping them towards their 'informed choice'!

Get me ay! Though reading that back - probably only makes sense to me too!! Plus, kind of explains why some of my ladies seem to end up more confused than when they started

Personally i don't think we should be giving anyone our opinions as friends/families could think innocently that what we are saying is how it should be, they could very easily rely on what we are saying rather than making their own informed choices, if for whatever reason the lady wants her baby with diamorphine, epidural whatever that should be her choice.

__________________
misscurious x

Applying for 2009

Mikey to win...

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If it was someone I didn't know very well, and only chatted to in passing then I wouldn't have said anything personally, as she has her midwife to discuss her pain relief etc with.

If it was someone I knew well who had ASKED me what I thought of it, then I would have told her what I know, and also state it is limited knowledge and advise her to seek the full facts from her midiwfe.

In either situation though I wouldn't give my opinion on it, as it is ust that...my opinion, and I feel there is a time and a place for it.

Not having a go crazy mofo, just saying what I would do.

__________________
Midwifemissy x

Student Midwife 2007
Student uni rep
Educational Resources Manager

Please help us raise funds for a bereavement room in Honey's memory by taking part in the SMNET Auction & Raffle here thanks x

Didn't read it as you having a go, just wise words!

thanks also to other replies (so soon as well), was also going to quote you (but how? do you need to do it individually?) mind you, I'm not even sure this is going to work!

yeah, i knew it wasn't right as soon as I said it and have thought about ever since. I analyse everything . so thanks again.

But what if you are her midwife, and she asks you outright what you think of diamorphine? Because are there any pro's really. I perhaps should look this and coming to the end of my 1st year shoul actually know it!!!!!

See, it didn't work, was meant to quote the sentences individually and reply in between, am such a technophobe. Is this editing going to work?

If she asks you as a midwife about diamorphine then give her the info about it but again stress that it is her choice as to what she decides for her birth, as health professionals, students, whatever we can't give our own opinion on anything, just the information available.

__________________
misscurious x

Applying for 2009

Mikey to win...

Please help us raise funds for a bereavement room in Honey's memory by taking part in the SMNET Auction & Raffle here thanks x

If I was her midwife, then I would hope I would have all the facts to give her, that way helping her to make an informed choice.

I still would never give her my opinion though, as it is only the facts that she wants and needs.

__________________
Midwifemissy x

Student Midwife 2007
Student uni rep
Educational Resources Manager

Please help us raise funds for a bereavement room in Honey's memory by taking part in the SMNET Auction & Raffle here thanks x

How did you manage to post so quick?

This is a great site, I've had my questions answered instantaneously. Wow

I did ask my husband about it and he said 'course you should tell her, you're being her advocate and she needs to know these things' LOL, he tries to understand this midwifery lark but he hasn't got a clue ( mind you neither have I)!

Lol, I was checking the different threads and noticed you had replied,not always so quick.

Well, as you learn you will be able to set him straight.

__________________
Midwifemissy x

Student Midwife 2007
Student uni rep
Educational Resources Manager

Please help us raise funds for a bereavement room in Honey's memory by taking part in the SMNET Auction & Raffle here thanks x