Childcare issues ahhh!!!

princesskel · #1 (**permalink**) 28-Jun-2008, 22:32

hi guys again, havent posted on here for a while as have been busy with college but am pleased to announce that i have passed my course with full accreditation however, i dont know if you know but my parents have helped me out with childcare over the past year and said theyd help when i went to uni although my mum has borderline personality disorder, i was going to apply to uni in sept for next year but my mum has informed me that she cannot look after my son now due to her disorder, i had my hopes set on going to uni next year and know that i cannot afford to go without the help of both of my parents, as they would be looking after my boy for most of the day as i cannot afford full childcare, i feel really let down and so tearful as my friends from college are all going to uni and im not, i know that my son comes first and would never put him second however, im sure im not the only one that would feel this way after getting your hopes up and then being let down, iv looked into training as an antenatal teacher to pass the time but i cant afford the training costs for that, i just wondered how everyone else manages to deal with childcare issues and money and whether im being selfish for feeling like this???
kellie

midwifemissy · #2 (**permalink**) 28-Jun-2008, 22:42

Hi Kellie,

Firstly, congratulations on passing your course, that feels really good.

I am so sorry to hear your Mum can no longer look after your son for you, and I can understand how disappointed you must feel about it. Would the childcare and dependents allowances you could claim not help to enable you to still go to uni?

I don't know your circumstances, or how much these allowances are as I have no young children, just trying to suggest a possible way you could manage?

Good luck hun and hope you can work out a way to still apply and start uni. xx

christa · #3 (**permalink**) 28-Jun-2008, 22:56

Hi Kellie

Writing this for the second time, managed to lose the first arghhh!!! Try not to worry, there is a childcare allowance that you can apply for through the nhs bursary and depending on your circumstances they will pay approx 75-80% of your childcare as long as you use a registered provider upto a max of approx £178 for one child, still leaves some that you have to pay yourself but is a help.

I'm in a similar situation I start my course in Sept and my Mum because of her work commitments can't offer me much help with childcare, so both my boys are booked into nursery which is going to cost me an arm and a leg, but am hopeful that because am on my own I will get the max childcare allowance but haven't heard from the bursary peeps yet, and am going to have to beg favours from friends and family when it comes to shifts!! But can't let it stop me, like you my boys are my priority but think in order for them to be happy and fulfilled they need me to be and I'm doing this for them as well so that I can offer them a better life.

Don't give up on your dream, sure you will be able to sort something. Good Luck

.

Christa x

princesskel · #4 (**permalink**) 29-Jun-2008, 08:42

thanks for your replies guys, i am proud of myself for passing my college course and it has given me more confidence, with the whole childcare thing tho i dont live by myself, i live with my partner who i think earns too much for us to qualify for help with childcare costs, its daft because even tho he earns too much we still struggle with money and because the bursary is means tested i wont get hardly anything, thats why i feel like im stuck with no way out, it feels like everywhere i turn there is no light at the end of the tunnel, this is my dream to become a midwife but my boy comes first and i have to know that he can be looked after as i dont want to have to go through the whole process of getting there, starting and then having to give up!!any more ideas??
kellie

midwifemissy · #5 (**permalink**) 29-Jun-2008, 09:13

Hi Kellie,

Why not give the bursay people a ring, explain your situation and ask if they can give you a rough idea of what you would be entitled to?

If they can do that, you might have a better idea if you can go for it or not? Good luck and I hope you can work something out. x

xPaulax · #6 (**permalink**) 29-Jun-2008, 11:21

if your partner works, do you claim tax credits? if so give them a call as they may contribute towards childcare costs for you, worth a try xx

mrsrobbiewilliams · #7 (**permalink**) 29-Jun-2008, 12:06

Could you possibly hold off for a year or so till he goes to school ??

I know you want to get going but sometimes it isnt always possible.

It may be easier to get after school care than full-time nursery on the money you have coming in ??

If not like midwifemissy suggests try ringing the bursary/tax credits people up for some further info.

I will be reliant on my parents for a lot of running around while i am at uni (2009!) and i know if you get let down it feels as though there is no hope.

Just keep trying as many different options as you can, thats all you can do .

XX

princesskel · #8 (**permalink**) 29-Jun-2008, 19:32

thanks guys, i will phone up the bursary people, we do get tax credits but not much as my partner earnt 25 grand last year so dont really get anything, i was going to apply in sept for next year so was all geared up for that but now have to wait for 2 years, im just finding it hard to readjust as i dont think its really sunk in yet that i cant go next year and keep thinking there may be a way!!i will get there one day just sometimes it feels like there is no light at the end of the tunnel and i wonder how on earth do other people do this with children??
thank you for all your replies and help, i really appreciate it
kellie

Cazzaeve · #9 (**permalink**) 29-Jun-2008, 20:01

Hey chick,

I do sympathise with you. Im starting my access course in september and want to go to uni next sept but i too am having trouble with whether that is a possibility or not. I have 2 children. My son is 15 months and daughter 10 weeks 2moro. I will have to fork out for childcare as my family all live 4 hours away so no help there im afraid. Im hoping to get a good enough bursary with the childcare element to allow me to do it, if not i will have to wait till they are both at school. Either way i want to be a midwive so i will be one day

. I know its hard when you really want something but try and focus on the positive. You've done a fab job to get this far and pass your access course. Try and do something that will make your application to uni look ace when you do apply ie: Voluntary work in healthcare setting, another qualification or just loading your brain with midwifery topics. Hope my words help a little. Good luck.

upsy daisy · #10 (**permalink**) 29-Jun-2008, 21:20

Hey hun
firstly well done on passing your course and I know how you feel....My parents work full time so unable to help out much with childcare (they would if they could), my in laws live too far away plus are not in the best of health so I have no one to rely on. I'm hoping to do access course from Sept part time which will take me 2 yrs, I have 2 children, 3 1/2yrs and 14 months. By the time I apply for uni for intake Sept 2010 my eldest will just be starting school but my youngest will need full time childcare - I can't afford to put training off any longer as I'm already 34 so will be 36 before I apply to uni (I know it's not THAT old but don't want to wait forever!), I would probably only get a limited bursary as OH earns a decent wage (it fluctuates depending on bonuses) BUT we still struggle as we have a large mortgage and way too much debt

(we are totally to blame on that one) so I know this is going to be a REAL issue for me too when the time comes to apply. I'm just going to speak to my trust when the time comes to see if I can get a secondment onto the course, if not, I may have to try and squeeze some bank shifts in just to get by....I'm not going to give up on my dream, I will find a way!!
xxx

Childcare issues ahhh!!!

Childcare issues ahhh!!!

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