Feeling so down

Hi ladies

feeling so down today, hope you don't mind me moaning, I am just sure that someone will say something lovely like you always do and put my day in perspective!

my mum has said a few times that she can not see me doing midwifery, and today tried to make a mention of this again. She told me she thinks it is "totally and utterly the wrong decision" for me and that she thinks I am not suited to working in a hospital. She also said, "you do realise childbirth involves a lot of blood?!" (I guess because I have only had c sections I probably am not aware of the amount of blood involved!)

she did say she thinks I am a caring and sensitive person and would suit a career where I have to look after people and give them advice, and when I said "like midwifery then" she replied that she and my Dad thought the perfect job for me would be to work in the Citizens Advice Bureau! When i pointed out that they are volunteers I think I took the wind out of their sails a little!!

in my heart I want to do this more and more but to have someone so close to me say it is "utterly" wrong is really starting to undermine my confidence, and I feel close to tears about it!

so sorry to post this and be so miserable! i didn't know if this was the right section to put this here so please forgive me if it isn't!

x x x

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Decided to postpone my application to 2010 for Beds and ARU x x x

Family can be such a nightmare sometimes! My mum said those exact words to me the other day too - it's bloomin charming isn't it!

It is such a hard decision - largely because it's a long, hard journey to become a midwife! But you seem more sure than I do about it being right for you - go for it my love - follow your heart - only you know what it's really telling you!

Keep your pecker up! x

oh no! what a thing to say!!!!

at the end of the day, only you know what you want to do. just because someone else cant see you doing it doesnt mean you cant.

like everyone on here, once you know midwifery is what you want to do, you KNOW. I have been wanting to do it for ten years, but only now is the right time for me. like you, people have said i wont do it because i dont like needles etc... i dont like needles in me, other people is different?!?!

you keep your chin up and focus on what's important - and that is what you want and what is right for you and your family.

big hugs!!!!
A xxxxxxxx

Oh Appletree don't feel down.

I know it hurts when some of the people closest to you don't believe you have what it takes.
Only you know how much you want to be a midwife and how committed you are to being a great midwife.
Try and use their concern as a catalyst to prove them wrong, I'm sure you have the self-belief to do it!
As for blood, I'm sure when that part of the training comes most people are a bit shocked, it's all a learning experience.

Keep positive and show them you can do it

xxxx

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Katy xx

Go with what your heart tells you. Work towards and gain your place. Only THEN you can decide whether or whether not it is for you. How do you know unless you've tried it!

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I am sorry you are having to deal with such negative comments from the very people you would expect to support you wholeheartedly.

Your Mum is right that midwifery does deal with blood, and other bodily fluids too, but in my experience you don't have th time to think about what it is, you just get on and deal with it, and do what you need to do.

I wouldn't let their negativity put you off doing what you really want to do, your own experiences of childbirth are just that, your experiences.

You do what feels right for you, and I am sure in time your parents will realise that you are doing something that feels right, and above all makes you happy.

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Midwifemissy x

Student Midwife 2007
Student uni rep
Educational Resources Manager

PAB Support Worker

Hi Appletree,

Oh you poor thing that is abit of a kick in the teeth but doesnt it make you even more determined to prove them wrong!!!! You follow your dream hun and soon your mum will be apologising ?sp for getting it soooo wrong!!!

Jules xxx

Oh sweet, im sorry it has put you in such a low mood. I agree with what everyone else has said, you have to follow your heart as you will always wonder what could have been. Familys are great but they can also be the worst at time just because they are so close to us.

I have changed as a person from doing this course, so what ever sort of person you are before the course you wont be the same when you finish. Im stronger, more confident, i stand up for what i believe and im happier.

Stick with it! But also if its not for you after a while dont beat your self up, so many people struggle if they get to a point when they really feel the course is not turning out the way they thought it would or that they just dont enjoy doing it. You have to make the decision that is best for you and no one, not even family can tell you what that is.

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Have you just been offered a place? If so and you want a mentor please post in post this forum (also post here if you would like a mentee)

(Quote)It is such a hard decision - largely because it's a long, hard journey to become a midwife! But you seem more sure than I do about it being right for you - go for it my love - follow your heart - only you know what it's really telling you!

Thanks Norman, I still have my doubts too which does not help! What makes it such a long hard road? Is it the volume of study?

Thanks ladies for all your comments and for such quick replies, feel loads cheered up as i knew I would! My hubby is really supportive too which helps! He also has that great simple way of looking at things as blokes do sometimes, rather than all the worry we can do!!

It is a shame my mum cannot be more on board but yes I do want to prove I can do it despite this, must try to be more focused and positive! And get tougher!! He he

x x x

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Decided to postpone my application to 2010 for Beds and ARU x x x

Aw hun, I am so sorry your mum is less than supportive, but I'm sure in her heart she means well. Perhaps you could have a heart to heart with her tell her that you really want to do this and you are going to give it all you've got and that it would be a big help if she could try and seem supportive, even if she does believe it's wrong for you, because it's going to be really hard and when the going gets tough the last thing you are going to want to hear is 'I told you so' or any other voicing of her doubts?

I bet she doesn't realise how down she is making you feel and would be mortified if she knew.

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Throughout the ages, the rainbow has been the symbol of hope, a promise of better things to come. The ancients greeks personified the rainbow as the goddess Iris.
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